Everybody Loves Your Money

I have absolutely the best luck in the whole world.  Not too long ago, I was sent an email from Peter Boltton.  He claimed that his boss died in a terrible plane crash and he needed help getting the money that his boss left behind.  He wanted to list me as his next of kin and I could share in all the money that he would get.  I chose not to get involved because it WAS OBVIOUSLY FRAUDULENT.

Well, I’ve received another letter.  Here is what I was sent:

Dear,
I am Major Ralph Harland, a British officer attached to UN peace
Keeping force in Iraq, I am the commanding officer of First Battalion
of the Royal Irish Regiment.
We managed to Move funds belonging to some demised persons who were
attacked and killed through insurgent attacks. The total amount is
US$9.5 Million dollars in cash. We want to move this money to you, so
that you may keep our share for us until when we shall come over to meet you.
We will take 60%, my partner and I. You take 40%. No strings attached,
just help us move it out of Iraq, Iraq is a war zone.
We plan on using Diplomatic courier to ship the money out, using
diplomatic immunity. If you are interested I will send you the full
details; my aim is to find a good partner that can be trusted.
Kindly send me an e-mail here ralphharland@*removed-so-no-one-is-tempted.com* signifying your
interest and your full contact details.
This business is 100% risk free.
Respectfully,
Major Ralph Harland.

Let’s take a quick look at this email.  For starters he addressed it to “Dear,”  Apparently the mail merges they use down in Nigeria, or wherever this particular scammer lives, is on the fritz.  My name wasn’t even on the letter.  Pretty sloppy for a supposed Major in the British military.

Secondly, my wife is British and almost every one of my inlaws lives in Britain and I’ve never heard them use the phrase, “…so that you may keep our share for us until when we shall come over to meet you”.  Sounds like a translation problem to me.  Just one more sign that this is a scam.  I suppose it doesn’t matter if they slip up a few times when they send these out.  I’m sure there will be at least one person that reads it and gets that little bit of hope that it’s true.  That’s all it takes for them to send their information to this scammer so that the fraud can really start happening.

You look in the couch cushion for a down payment

Anything at your workplace is deep fried

You know any bill collector on a first name basis

Your car payment is more than 30% of your take home pay

You are on a payment plan at the local payday loan office

Your credit card minimum payment is more than 15% of your take home pay

You don’t know what “interest rate” means

You’ve never heard of a “fixed rate” mortgage

You can’t keep the $100 minimum in your checking account

You’ve been late paying the rent more than once this year

You think negative amortization is a good thing

You change jobs more than twice a year

You seek investment advice from the payday loan clerk

The current check number in your checkbook is 6

You have paid one credit card payment with a cash advance from another

You have more than $5000 on your credit cards

You cash your checks at a check cashing branch

Your bank account is in your ex-girlfriend’s brothers name

From: broknowrchlatr

You are not able to save money each month while renting

You have declared bankrupcy in the last 3 years – obviously you need to learn how to manage money

You have less than 5% to put down – PMI is terrible and 80/20 loans are risky (for most)

Your savings ratio matches the national average

From SavvySaver

You had to have a co-signer on your car loan

You have had anything repossessed in the last three years

You think leasing furniture and/or electronics is a good idea

You aren’t contributing enough to your 401(k) to get the full company match 

And I know you’ve got a few.  Let’s see how long we can make the list!  Leave them in the comments and I’ll add them in!

I read a great article in the local paper here about a couple that has found themselves in a high stress situation.  They simply can’t afford their home.  They have an 80% value mortgage and a 20% “extra” loan for their home.  Due to their credit card debt, they couldn’t get a standard mortgage so they found someone that offered a solution for them.

House price: $246,800

Their main loan: 80% @ variable rate interest adjusting monthly

Secon loan: 20% @ 12.5% interest

Income (Him): $12.75 per hour

Income (Her): $11.75 (and then reduced to $7.89 when she quit her job)

Credit Card Debt: $20,000

Savings: $0

These people shouldn’t have bought a house.  They shouldn’t have qualified (which they didn’t through traditional means).  Unfortunately, they found someone that got them in the house at all costs.  Now, due to their poor decision making, they are really in a bind and will most likely lose their house as the payments adjust up each month.

Here’s what I think they should have done:

-Made the commitment to buy a house

-Paid off all credit card debt

-Set up an emergency fund

-Stayed in their current jobs to maintain their income

Had they simply done these things, they would have qualified for a traditional mortgage without all of these terms that pretty much guaranteed they would fail.  They also would have positioned themselves much better financially so that they could handle a bump in the road.  Well, they didn’t do that and now are working on becoming yet another statistic in this home mortgage melt down.

Check out the article here:

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2003696532_loan07.html